Depression through the lens of connection.
Symptoms of depression are one of the most common concerns that bring people to therapy.
In our society there can be a heavy focus on the medical factors involved, particularly how someone’s brain chemistry and genetics cause depression. And while this is true that biology certainly plays a role; depression may be a deeply human, completely understandable response to factors in our lives and our environments.
In his book Lost Connections, investigative journalist Johann Hari explores the causes of depression. Hari acknowledges the role of genes and changes in the brain, as well as seven forms of disconnection that are significant factors:
Disconnection from Meaningful Work
Disconnection from Other People
Disconnection from Meaningful Values
Disconnection from Childhood Trauma/Unresolved trauma
Disconnection from Status and Respect
Disconnection from the Natural World
Disconnection from a Hopeful or Secure Future
In considering these disconnects, Hari explores a range of strategies we can focus on that are known to be helpful.
Reconnect To Other People: We live in the most digitally connected era in human history, yet may people lack deep meaningful relationships and experience chronic loneliness. People are evolutionarily wired to live in community, yet many people experience social isolation. Reconnecting means actively pushing against the urge to hide and to engage in face-to-face relationships where you feel seen, valued, and safe. You can start small by scheduling regular, low-pressure meetups with friends, joining a local club, or sharing with someone you trust.
If you feel stuck in a rut, ‘social prescribing’ is an actionable strategy where you “prescribe” yourself collaborative, group-based activities focused on a shared goal. Look for activities that force you out of your head and into a shared environment, such as volunteering, participating in a community garden, or a class or workshop about an interest you have.
Reconnect To Meaningful Work: We spend so much of our time working. For those with jobs where there is little control, agency, or flexibility in their work tasks, this can be most detrimental. We know this is often a place where people feel they have little room to change their situation, but you can look for small ways to shift work. This might look like setting firmer boundaries at your current job, taking on projects that align with your actual strengths, or actively planning a transition toward a workplace environment that respects employee input and cooperative decision-making. If you can’t change the work, it is extra important to have role and activities outside of the work that feels meaningful and fulfilling, whether in your family, your community, or your hobbies.
Reconnect To Meaningful Values: Advertising sells us the idea that happiness comes through ‘more’- the next promotion, a flashier car, or the new ‘it’ thing. While there is an initial burst of feel good with these things, the boost isn’t sustaining. Shift your focus back toward intrinsic values—the things you do purely for the joy and meaning they bring. Make time for creative hobbies that have no financial incentive, practice acts of kindness without expecting anything in return, and invest your energy into experiences rather than material possessions.
Reconnect with sympathetic joy: Our society encourages extreme individualism, which can trap us in a loop of self-critique and social comparison. A powerful antidote to this is the practice of “sympathetic joy” a mindset focused on actively celebrating the successes and happiness of other people. By intentionally training your brain to feel glad for a friend’s good fortune or a coworker’s win, you dissolve the walls of envy and comparison, which lowers your stress and encourages a sense of a larger community.
Reconnect to the Natural World: We know that animals in captivity display psychological distress, yet we don’t often consider that people in modern cities are living in a form of captivity. Studies show that spending time in nature reduces stress, anxiety, and lifts mood. This can even be in the city- in your garden, having a picnic in the park or walking along the river pathways. Reconnecting with the natural world grounds us in a reality larger than our own worries.
Reconnect to Self- Acknowledge and Face Past Trauma: Unresolved past trauma and painful experiences alters how we feel about ourselves and the world around us. Reconnection means de-stigmatizing these past wounds, talking about them openly in safe spaces, and recognizing that some depression is a form of grief for a history that was never properly processed.
Reconnect to a Hopeful and Secure Future: Depression can take away our ability to envision a positive (or even neutral) tomorrow, leaving you stuck in a state of paralysis, unable to take action. Restoring your future means taking practical control over what you can change to build a sense of possibility. You can start by mapping out manageable mid-to-long term personal goals, or joining advocacy groups that fight for broader societal changes that align with the future you want.
You don’t have to try all the reconnection strategies to notice a difference, pick one or two to start that feel doable and see what you notice.
Finding What Works for You
If you would like help addressing symptoms of depression, or how to put these ideas into tangible strategies in your life, please reach out.
We can help answer questions or support determining next steps for you. Contact us using the form below, or visit our Therapists and Booking page.
